I HAVE BAD NEWS

I have bad news for you, for all of our fellow citizens, and people who love peace all over the world. And that is that Martin Luther King was shot and killed tonight.

Martin Luther King dedicated his life to love and justice for his fellow human beings, and he died for that effort.

In this difficult day for the United States, it is perhaps well to ask what kind of a nation we are and what kind and what direction we want to move in. For those of you who are black – considering the evidence, there evidently is, that there were white people who were responsible – you can be filled with bitterness, with hatred, and a desire for revenge. We can move in that direction as a country, in great polarization – black people amongst black, white people amongst white, filled with hatred toward one another.

Or we can make an effort, as Martin Luther King did, to understand and to comprehend, and to replace that violence, that stain of bloodshed that has spread across our land, with an effort to understand with compassion and love.

For those of you who are black and are tempted to be filled with hatred and distrust for the injustice of such an act, against all white people, I can only say that I feel in my own heart the same kind of feeling. I had a member of my family killed, but he was killed by a white man. But we have to make an effort in the United States; we have to make an effort to understand, to go beyond these difficult times.

My favorite poet was Aeschylus. He wrote: "In our sleep, pain which cannot forget falls drop by drop upon the heart until, in our own despair, against our will, comes wisdom from the awful grace of God."

What we need in the United States is not division; what we need in the United States is not hatred; what we need in the United States is not violence or lawlessness; but love and wisdom, and compassion toward one another, and a feeling of justice toward those who still suffer within our country, whether they be white or they be black.

So I shall ask you tonight to return home, to say a prayer for the family of Martin Luther King, that’s true, but more importantly to say a prayer for our own country, which all of us love – a prayer for understanding and that compassion of which I spoke.

We can do well in this country. We will have difficult times; we’ve had difficult times in the past; we will have difficult times in the future. It is not the end of violence; it is not the end of lawlessness; it is not the end of disorder.

But the vast majority of white people and the vast majority of black people in this country want to live together, want to improve the quality of our life and want justice for all human beings who abide in our land.

Let us dedicate ourselves to what the Greeks wrote so many years ago: to tame the savageness of man and make gentle the life of this world.

Let us dedicate ourselves to that, and say a prayer for our country and our people.

This speech was given by Robert F. Kennedy, on April 4, 1968 in Indianapolis, Indiana, in the heart of the inner city. RFK was warned by the police that he could not be protected in the event of a riot. He went anyway.

That night riots broke out in over one hundred U.S. cities, but not in Indianapolis, where the crowd went home weeping, but not rioting.

We are frequently told that as a nation, we are hopelessly divided, that we have become increasingly tribal, that our lines of separation have become permanently hardened.

Maybe we just need to bring the Indianapolis speech into our classrooms and never vote for any man or woman who cannot pass a quiz on its context or content.

                                           

GANGSTERS, TRUMPS, AND THIEVES - PART ONE

For those of us anxiously awaiting the first wave of books and movies, chronicling the Rise and Fall of the House of Trump, every spicy story-appetizer served up by leaks and investigative reporting pleasantly teases us with the feast that will one day be served – hopefully served warm, rather than cold.

We already know that the feast will include heaping portions of Russian caviar and lots of Stolichnaya vodka, so how appropriate that a catering hall has a prominent place in this Russian flavored American saga!

El Caribe is a catering hall/social club in Brooklyn, New York. Check out their website. It looks like a beautiful venue for a wedding, anniversary or birthday party, bar mitzvah or christening, or a future celebration of the return of our national sanity, hopefully beginning in November.

But today’s El Caribe lacks the sizzle that it had a few decades ago. In the 1970s through 1990s, Russian and Italian mobsters did a lot of socializing, celebrating and business dealings at the Brooklyn gathering spot.

Evesei Agron, otherwise known as the Russian Godfather, had an office there. So did Marat Balagula, sometimes referred to as the Russian Tony Soprano.  Marat was a sometimes business partner of Anthony “Gaspipe” Casso, a ruthless murderer who headed the Mafia’s Lucchese crime family.

Back in the day, you would likely have run into Gaspipe at El Caribe, because Gaspipe was held in high regard by the club’s owner, Morton Levine, or “Uncle Morty,” as he was known to his favorite nephew, Michael Cohen.

Michael Cohen and his cousins each owned a piece of Uncle Morty’s El Caribe, though Michael “the Fixer” Cohen gave up his interest when Donald Trump was elected president.

I guess he thought it might look bad.

After all, he expected to be awarded a big job in the Trump administration, maybe chief-of-staff.  Attention would be paid to his business interests.

He never got the job, but he is certainly getting the attention.

Besides bungling the porn star problem, what else did Michael “the Fixer” Cohen fix? Besides Donald Trump, the man he called, “Boss,” who else in the House of Trump did he fix problems for? And, just what means did he employ to fix those problems?

Clues to answering that third question might begin in the book chapter entitled, El Caribe.

Well, that's it for now. Time really flies when you're talking about murderous gangsters with colorful nicknames and connections to the president's buddy-in-charge of solving potentially embarrassing problems. 

More delicious appetizers will be served in my next two minutes. Yum!

A TALE OF TWO FIXERS (OR FIXERS WHO NEED FIXERS)

Ray Donovan is a fictional character. Please keep that in mind. Ray drives a cool Mercedes, wears expensive suits, and has a drawer full of Rolex watches. Maybe not every one of them is a Rolex. Maybe some of them are more expensive than a Rolex. I have no idea. The point is that Ray Donovan is just about the coolest tough guy you would ever meet.

Cool as he is, you would not want to meet him if you were causing problems for one of his employers, like a big law firm or a movie star or a rich professional athlete, etc. etc. etc. Ray gets hired by the rich and famous to make problems go away. He will do what his employer can’t do, which might mean a duffle bag full of cash, an envelope full of compromising photos, or a very convincing threat of bodily harm.

Michael Cohen dubbed himself Donald Trump’s Ray Donovan. Every kid should have a role model.

Presidential candidate, Donald Trump had a pesky little problem with a porn star. His lawyer and fixer, Michael Cohen made the problem go away. End of story!

Well, not quite!

The silenced porn star came strolling onto center stage, arm-in-arm with the lawyer from Hell. And now, Michael “the fixer” Cohen has an influence peddling problem, which happens to include – you won’t believe this -- a Russia connection!

Now the ex-fixer, himself, has been silenced and will likely remain silenced until he decides to sing like a canary to stay out of prison. Michael Cohen – a fixer no more -- will need to find a new claim to fame, not to mention a new fictional role model.

Fortunately, the president has found a new fixer.

Enter Rudy Giuliani!

Finally, the president has the defender he needs and deserves – a former legendary prosecutor and associate of Robert Mueller, a former legendary crime-busting mayor, and the hero whose strength and calm under fire guided New York in the aftermath of 9/11.

And more importantly, a combative personality who could go on television news shows with a big (and strange) smile, and slap down biased interviewers, who are on a mission to trick Trump surrogates into telling the truth.

Oh, and one more thing: a man who has perfected the skill of answering any tough question by adding the line “Hilary did worse and she didn’t go to jail.”

As you know, Rudy got off to a rather rocky start. First he contradicted the president’s claim that he didn’t know about the $130,000 payoff to Stormy Daniels. Then he tried to explain why the contradiction wasn’t really a contradiction. Then he explained that he was new on the job and wasn’t quite up to speed on the facts.

It was important for us to know that the president did nothing illegal and despite appearances, he was not trying to influence the election, and Hilary did a lot worse and didn’t go to jail.

So, seeing the mounting confusion and increased legal jeopardy, his employer had to step in and fix it, as only he could. Here’s what the great communicator said:

“When Rudy made the statements – Rudy’s great – but Rudy had just started and wasn’t totally familiar with everything.”

“We love Rudy, he’s a special guy. What he really understands is, this is a witch hunt. He understands that probably better than anybody … but when he made certain statements, he just started yesterday.”

And that pretty much explains it. Don’t you think?

Of course there is more. The Rudy Reality Show is still going strong. But that is for another two minutes.

PORTRAIT OF THE ARTIST AS A YOUNG MAN

John Miller really admired Donald Trump – and I mean, really admired Donald Trump. You could hear it in his voice.

In 1991, when People Magazine reporter, Sue Carswell placed a phone call to Donald Trump to get a scoop on an upcoming story, she lucked out when John Miller returned her call. John Miller said he was “sort of handling PR.” For a sort of handler of PR, he had an awful lot of information to share about Donald Trump’s very public personal life.

If you listen to the tape recording of the phone call or read the transcript, you will see that John Miller did not sound smooth, prepared or professional. For a publicist, he was surprisingly inarticulate and rambling.

But he did have very clear intentions.

He wanted to set the record straight on the breathtaking love life of his employer, Donald Trump.

The People Magazine story should tell readers that in divorcing his wife, Ivana, Donald Trump had been very generous, even though he didn’t have to be so generous. She and her lawyer were clearly trying to get around the terms of his prenuptial agreement. And the judge was helping them.

But Donald prevailed. Donald Trump always prevailed.

It was also important for readers to know that Ivana wanted to get back together with him, even though she had recently said the exact opposite in an interview with Barbara Walters. That falsehood needed to be set straight.

And now he had broken up with Marla Maples, but that didn’t have anything to do with her. It was just that it was “too soon after his divorce” for him to “be making a commitment.” But he was going to be very good to Marla. And everyone should know that the ring he bought her was definitely “never an engagement ring,” even though it was being falsely reported that way in the press.

Even back in those days, the press was often unfair to Donald Trump, but in this case, that was okay because Donald Trump was “immune” to bad press. In fact it was better than okay because if he had gotten a lot of good press, Ivana and her lawyer would have known that Donald had weathered his financial set-backs and was now “doing well financially and in every other way,” and it would have cost him more to settle his divorce, because Ivana would have held out for a better deal.

So, the press played right into his hands, and it all worked in Donald Trump’s favor.

And to set the record straight on his supposed engagement to Marla, the next time he goes into a jewelry store to buy a gift for a woman, he will not make the mistake of buying a ring, because of how that can be misinterpreted, presumably by lawyers, judges, and future girl friends as being a marriage commitment.

He was capable of learning from his mistakes.

And about his budding relationship with model, Carla Bruni, “she is very beautiful,” “they are great friends,” and her father is “one of the richest men in Europe.”

But we should not expect to see an exclusive relationship develop with Carla because, as publicist, John Miller explained to Sue Carswell:

“…I think he’s got a whole open field really. A lot of people really. A lot of people that you write about…really are, I mean they call. They just call. Actresses, people that you write about just call to see if they can go out with him and things.”

Oh, and Madonna wanted to date him, but he really wasn’t interested. We should know that. We should! Stop rolling your eyes!

And one more piece of bad reporting, depriving the public of an important truth, was a story that Donald wanted to go out with Madonna, when in reality, Donald Trump wasn’t interested in Madonna. Got it?

To truly understand the mind of Donald Trump (and who doesn’t?), you have to appreciate its complexity. And this historically important interview about the man and his women, gives us a glimpse of that complexity – especially this, according to John Miller:

 “[Carla] is a very successful model, etc., etc. But again, he didn’t leave Marla for her. He just wants [indiscernible], he does things for himself. He leaves for himself, he does things for himself. He, when he makes the decision, that will be a very lucky woman. But he’s not going to do that until he makes the decision. You know, when he makes the decision. He’s very capable of total commitment when he makes the decision. But he felt it’s too soon. Off the record, he probably felt Marla wasn’t the right one, or whatever, but he just felt it was too soon.”

 If you do not know how this interview turned out, it might have hit you by now that the rather scattered delivery of John Miller is strangely similar to the very scattered delivery of Donald Trump.

And the reason for this similarity is that John Miller actually was Donald Trump pretending to be the completely fictitious John Miller, speaking on behalf of Donald Trump.

When presidential candidate, Donald Trump was confronted with the tape of this fascinating, but disturbing, phone interview from his past, he of course set the record straight:

“…it doesn’t sound like my voice at all. I have many, many people that are trying to imitate my voice and then you can imagine that, and this sounds like one of those scams, one of the many scams – doesn’t sound like me.”

So, are you going to believe him or your lying ears?

I blew past my two minutes. Sorry, I just had to.

Hear the John Miller Interview

Read the transcript of the interview

NO ROOM FOR DESSERT!

It is really not fair when spectacularly encouraging news happens within a few days of other spectacularly encouraging news. Before you are finished celebrating and savoring the first mood booster, you have another and maybe even better one to begin digesting. Think of when the waiter ruined your perfect dining experience by bringing your amazing entrée while you were still enjoying your amazing appetizer.

So, you find out that the FBI raided the office, home, and hotel room of Michael Cohen, Trump’s personal attorney. Holy cow! Did anyone see that coming? What incriminating treasures are now in the hands of America’s lawmen?

And then, Paul Ryan, the most powerful enabler in government announces his retirement, making that promised blue wave look even bigger and bluer. At another time, this story would be huge, and there would so much to talk about, but living as we do in a 3-ring Trumpian circus, it can be difficult to keep your eyes on the fire-eater, while another performer is sticking his head in a tiger’s mouth.

Like I said, it’s not fair.

But, back to the Cohen treasure chest.

Michael Cohen, the self-proclaimed fixer, was apparently doing much more fixing than lawyering.

Fortunately for us, he is a very sloppy fixer.

He missed getting his client’s signature on the Stormy Daniels non-disclosure agreement, possibly nullifying the NDA. Oops!

Now we know that he brokered a $1.6 million hush-money deal for Elliott Broidy, RNC deputy fundraising chair who made the completely understandable mistake of impregnating a Playboy Playmate, who was also not his wife. Did the fixer really think this would stay fixed?

So Broidy was forced to resign, following in the equally creepy footsteps of former RNC fundraising chair, Steve Wynn. But that is not the priceless, museum quality treasure unearthed in the raid on the president’s sloppy fixer.

Nope! There is something bigger and much more precious.

There just might be solid evidence that Michael Cohen lied about a very important matter – a matter of Russian collusion in the 2016 presidential election.

The famous Christopher Steele dossier claimed that Michael Cohen was in Prague in late August or early September of 2016 for the purpose of meeting with Russian hackers to discuss paying for their services without leaving a trace of those payments.

Michael Cohen reacted immediately to this report, by stating: “I have never been to Prague in my life.” He even showed a picture of his passport to prove it. Does the Mueller team have proof that he was in Prague? Do they have proof that he met with Russian hackers? Do they have proof that payments were made?

And will Michael “the Fixer” Cohen do as he once bragged by “taking a bullet” for Donald Trump?

Or will Michael Cohen, decide not to spend the rest of his life in prison and do what mobster, Sammy “the Bull” Gravano did to his boss, John Gotti, and testify against Donald Trump?

That would truly be a Fantasy Flip!

I can’t believe my two minutes are up, and I haven’t even mentioned the name, Comey.

THE FANTASY FLIP

If you are using up far too much time, energy, and optimism trying to survive Trump, then you are of course rooting, along with me, for the Trump presidency not to survive. The day has long passed when we had some hope that the man would grow in office. Of course, he has grown – grown more reckless, more childish, more thoughtless, more vindictive, and more frightened of being caught, exposed, prosecuted, and punished.

We now know that this will get worse before it gets better. It is as though he has shifted into a gear we didn’t know he had.

I do not know when or how he will completely unravel, but when he does it will probably be at breath-taking speed.

You can bet that we will eventually see the tax returns. We will see proof of his businesses running on secret Russian loans and laundered Russian rubles. We will see him for the criminal that he has always been, rather than his self-constructed myth of the shrewd businessman, whose success was due to his supposed “brilliance,” and his mastery of the art of the deal.

No! Success came from selling his empty soul to a Russian devil.

We all will see him pay.

Al Capone did not get locked up for murder, extortion, or bootlegging. He went to prison for the victimless crime of tax evasion. I am sure that some of his victims and their family members felt that justice had not been served. But Capone died in prison, where he had begun to lose his mind due to syphilis – an acceptable happy ending for most ordinary, decent members of society.

A modern day and equally infamous mob boss, John Gotti, aka: the Dapper Don, also died in prison. He became boss of the Gambino crime family by murdering Frank Castellano, the man who was then occupying that position.

Gotti’s other  nickname was the Teflon Don, for his success in swaggering out of court rooms after juries would fail to convict him for crimes he had obviously committed.

That changed when Sammy “The Bull” Gravano, Gotti’s underboss, enforcer, and confidant, decided that rather than spend the rest of his life in prison, he would testify against his boss in exchange for a sweetheart deal – a very controversial sweetheart deal.

Sammy the Bull had murdered nineteen people, leaving nineteen circles of angry family members and friends who would see their justice denied. There would be justifiable blow back. Signing off on that deal would take an individual who would not be swayed by anything standing in the way of locking up the arrogant, defiant, "you will never convict me" mob boss.

The man who would not be swayed was the U.S. Assistant Attorney General for the Criminal Division of the Department of Justice -- the quiet man, Robert Mueller.

For all those driven to see John Gotti put behind bars, Sammy the Bull was their Fantasy Flip – a Fantasy Flip turned into reality.

So my fellow Trump survivors, who would be your Fantasy Flip?

If you don’t already have one, I suggest you put it near the top of your to-do list. It just might help you stay positive, while you are waiting for justice.

I will tell you my Fantasy Flip, but that will have to wait until my next two minutes.

A QUICK SEX SCANDAL REVIEW OF THE PARTY IN POWER

There is a lot to cover here, and because I am limited to two minutes, I will have to talk fast. So please pay attention.

Number One on The Hit Parade: Stormy Daniels, Of Course!

Thanks to her never-letting-up lawyer, Michael Avenatti, who keeps his client under the spotlight, with legal maneuvers and schoolyard taunts of the Orange Man and the Orange Man’s hatchet man, Michael Cohen, Stormy’s smiling face (and other famous parts) are just about inescapable. Avenatti is having fun with this. Stormy is having fun with this. Donald Trump, not so much.

The Best Trophy Girlfriend Award: Playboy Model, Karen McDougal.

For ten months, until she says that she broke it off, she was his mistress. Normally, it’s bad P.R. for a married man to be traveling around with a woman who is not his wife, instead of with the woman who is his wife. Fortunately, this president makes his own alternative P.R. -- which is just fine for those who enjoy alternative facts.

The Unappreciative Apprentice Award: Summer Zervos.

She says that Donald Trump didn’t just say, “You’re fired!” he made unwanted sexual advances. He says she’s a liar. Now, she is suing for defamation of character. The courts said the suit can proceed. When it does, there will be a discovery phase. When Paula Jones sued Bill Clinton, it was the discovery phase that led to Monica Lewinski’s icky dress. And that is what led to Bill Clinton’s impeachment.

The Bizarre Hypocrisy Award: Tim Murphy.

This Pennsylvania Republican, a vehemently anti-abortion lawmaker, was forced to resign after it was revealed that, upon learning that his mistress was pregnant with his child, he tried to coerce her into having an abortion. Apparently, abortion had its place, when it came to protecting his own self-important backside. The special election to fill his seat resulted in a shockwave win by Democrat, Conor Lamb.

The “That is Definitely Not My Job Description” Award: Trent Franks.

This Republican Arizona lawmaker was forced to resign after it was revealed that he approached  female staff members with a request that one of them agree to act as a surrogate by carrying his child – presumably utilizing the fun method of impregnation. 

The “I Really Thought This Was Part of My Benefits Package” Award: Patrick Meehan.  

Compared with the other members of this club, it might not seem like such a big deal that this Republican lawmaker settled his sexual harassment claim brought by a female aide by paying her off with taxpayer money (which the House kept secret until House women forced open the closet door), but he made the list because he had to resign his position on the House Committee on…wait for it…wait for it…The House Committee on ETHICS! He will not be seeking re-election.

The Creepiest Judge in History Award: Roy Moore.

He almost made it to Congress as Alabama’s replacement for Jeff Sessions. I think when you get thrown out of a shopping mall for having a history of stalking young girls, you probably shouldn’t go to Congress, or ever have presided over a trial, or ever be allowed within twenty feet of an elementary school.

Of course there have been some recent sex-related scandals in the Democratic Party. But, none of them possess the entertaining weirdness of those on this special list. Democrats will take back the House in November. And some of them will behave badly. Let’s not forget to skewer them when they do.

But, until then, I just need to survive Trump.

My timer just sounded. It was set for exactly two minutes.